Wednesday, August 17, 2011

A backyard named blackmail

Prologue

Yesterday, I ran out of my regular bird food.  

Not thinking it would matter, I decided to use some old birdseed from a few years ago when I did not have as many regular feathered visitors.  I guess I thought that a substitute would serve just fine.  But, like Tennessee Williams' Streetcar Named Desire, there simply is no substitute for what one desires.


Stella Starling:  We have company coming, Stanley.  Brush your hair down.

Stanley Starling:  Stella!  Quit bossin' me around!


Stella Starling:  Well, hello Blanche!

Blanche Starling:  Stella, my dear, it is so good to see you!  Seems like I haven't seen you forever!

Stella Starling:  Not since our nest days, my dear friend!

Blanche Starling:  Oh, my, your feathers have come in so fine!

Stella Starling:  Well, thank you dear.  So what do we owe the pleasure of you and your friends' visit, Blanche?


Blanche Starling:  Well, have you noticed the change in this House Lady's backyard?

Stella Starling:  Change?  Not really.  We just arrived here today.


Blanche Starling:  Well, take a look over there at those feeders.  House Lady has slipped in some awful bad bird seed.  It's causing such a stir!  Everybody's cranky and grouchy and just darn feisty!  Just look at Marlon and Karl down there going at it!


Marlon Starling:  Karl, you best get outta here or I'll lay some kung fu on ya!


Karl Starling:  Marlon, I'm not afraid of you!  You're just a big ole bully!

Marlon Starling:  I warned ya ... I'm coming down hard on ya, boy!


Stanley Starling:  You girls need to figure out something soon or those two are going to kill each other!

Harold Starling:  My, this is such fresh water you have here.  Do you mind if I freshen up a bit.  It was a bit of a fly to get here since we had breakfast over at the Williams' house.

Blanche Starling:   For goodness sakes, Harold.  We have serious business here!

Stella Starling:  Oh my Blanche!  We had no idea!  We came here to feed cause we had heard nothing but good things about this backyard.  What can we do?


Blanche Starling:  I say we strike!  No more pretty poses until we get better food!


Stella Starling:  Great idea, Blanche!  Let's call her out!

Blanche Starling:  HEY HOUSE LADY!  We need to talk!

Me:  My goodness, starlings, what's all the ruckus here!

Blanche Starling:  House Lady, this no-good-for-nothing birdseed is not fit for consumption by us birds!  It's so bad, even the squirrels won't touch it!

Me:  Really?  That bad?  I had been wondering where the squirrels had been lately.  The birdseed was on sale and I thought, well .....  it just all seemed to be the same to me.

Blanche Starling:  Well, give it to the horses!  We're not stopping by any more until it's changed!  None of us!  We'll go on strike and that'll be the end of that blog thingy of yours!

Me:  Okay, okay!  I'm sorry!  Heading out right now to get the good stuff!  Jeez!

Stella Starling:  Ha! Ha! Ha!  Sure got her wrapped around our pinkie toes!

Blanche Starling:  Humans.  They're such an easy mark!  And yet ....  I have always depended on the kindness of them!

: : :


38 comments:

TexWisGirl said...

gotta get the good stuff! :) ha!

Saun said...

Lol love it...

Sylvia K said...

What a hoot! And you have made my afternoon! Terrific capture and matching dialog! You are a very creative lady!!!

Sylvia

Mental P Mama said...

So adorable...love that last shot!

Kamana said...

LOL!!!

Ann said...

uh oh, bad seed. Awesome pictures, I could actually hear those words coming out of the birds mouths :)

Ali said...

love it.... btw... same thing happened to me when I bought some cheap bird food .. my snooty cardinals were very displeased.

Nancy @ A Rural Journal said...

You crack me up.

My cats don't like the cheap cat food either. They'll eat a mouse, but not the cheap cat food. Go figure.

Jill said...

Too funny!

Ginny said...

Well, they do all have to depend upon the kindness of strangers!! You have some discerning birds there who must have the taste buds of the iron chefs!! What a very cool bird fight you captured!

Lois Evensen said...

Just love your stories. :))) Terrific!

Country Girl said...

Oh, wow. They look like they're really talking.

Louise said...

That was a great story and the pictures are wonderful. I just want to know why the starlings around here aren't as cute as yours are.

Dianne said...

You made my day Reena -love their personalities - just like us only they come in a smaller package!

Deanna said...

Oh Reena, another great story & pics...we house ladies can be picky about our food, so I guess Stella and Blanche can too.

ladyfi said...

Thanks for the smiles today! This was delightful!

Kathy said...

Love the "fight" pictures!

CherryPie said...

Made me smile :-) I love the photos.

Dyche Designs said...

They really are so particular about their food aren't they. Picky little critters but you've got to love them.

Dianna said...

These pictures are amazing. And your dialogue always makes me laugh! Good job!

Ana Eugenio said...

oh Reena :) this is all so cute! you're so blessed to have these daily companions. and I love the fact that you're sharing your adorable photos with us :)

Catherine said...

Haha ~ you have very demanding customers don't you!! Perhaps they just have more refined taste buds. ;)
xo Catherine

Daryl said...

Too funny ... loved the Karl and Marlon exchange I really LOL at that.

grammie g said...

Hi Renna ...I read this post yesterday got distracted and never left a comment ..it came to me
this morning when I saw yours on mine!
I laughed so at those Starlings little fight...birds are so intertaining...lol
Your captions in story ..loved it!!!
Grace

Gail Dixon (Louisiana Belle) said...

Haha, you have spoiled your birds rotten. Too funny!

Jillsy Girl said...

smiling! :-)

Roan said...

I guess they told you. Picky birds! Cute narrative.

Madi and Mom said...

That is too funny... you have my eyes leaking.

You would think the birds would appreciate any seed but no they want the best.

Thanks for the laugh,
C

Woody said...

Such drama at the bird feeder, great story. You can sell the right for a 'made for TV' movie ;-)

justine said...

I loved reading this post and these shots are wonderful

dona said...

Ahahah! Such a funny story! Love it! :D

bobbybegood1 said...

Why aren't you a screenwriter? That's your calling. You are simply a genius. And, I won't mention the fact that "Desire" is my ALL TIME FAVE MOVIE. Great exchange of ideas. Bird characters true to form. Wonderful title. I really enjoyed. Cheers reena!!

Friko said...

The cheek of them!
There you are, making them famous, and what do you get in return? Complaints!

lisa said...

What a fun post Reena!!
Great photos, and thank you for the smiles!

Hilary said...

Too funny but I say that if they're going to yell at you, you yell back. Start with "STELLAAAAAAAAAAAA!" ;)

I did that once too.. bird seed on sale.. no birds in yard. Unfortunately, I bought three huge bags of it.

~Kim at Golden Pines~ said...

I'm just glad this didn't turn into something from Alfred Hitchcock's 'The Birds!' :-)

You really have a knack for putting the best caption with your amazing pictures!!!

Sharkbytes said...

Well, it would be no great loss to cut down on the number of starlings.

~Lavender Dreamer~ said...

Oh my! This is hilarious...well, don't tell the birds I said that! heehee! ♥